Tomorrow is February 1 and I am embarking on the Thank and Grow Rich challenge to seek gratitude each day for 30 days. I aim to document each day the three blessings/things-I’m-grateful-for. You might think, “Isn’t your whole blog dedicated to and named after being grateful?”

And to you, dear Question Asker, I would say, “The second word in the name is also extremely important.”

Seeker

I consider myself pretty on-board with being grateful. But remembering to be grateful (in “all things” as Jesus and Pam Grout and many others recommend) is not my default state. I’d like it to be! But it is not. If you have a sad trombone, please play it for me. And then let’s move on.

Some disclosure: last time I tried this, I became unglued. I had never really tried to go through life this way and the first few days were straight. up. magic. I was in a euphoric state and everything was new. Then some old ugliness started welling up from somewhere and I got sick (cold. Not a man cold, though, so whew!) and cranky and threw the whole thing out. It didn’t sustain my euphoria.

And so this time around? I became nervous and scared at the thought of trying again. Didn’t want to do it. Didn’t want it to “fail me” “again”. And that’s when the wise counsel of a loved one or trusted friend is divine. My wife noted that maaaaaybe I am pinning too much on the outcome and my ability to “perform” the tasks. She reminded me that it is about the process and opening up to what’s inside.

So let’s do this thing! No ideas about how it will go. Dismantling preconceptions as we go.

I forgot to mention: if I stick with this thing, Day 30 will be on my birthday.